Wednesday, January 11, 2012

Jesus CEO - Internal Anchors

What are your internal anchors?  (Where are you grounded?)
From whom do you seek approval?

One line from this chapter that really suck out was, the Omega leader has a backbone like a rod of steel when it comes to doing the right thing.

This comment makes me think about something that surfaces my thoughts on occasion.  I am not saying that I agree with this but sometimes I feel like God made us to be human, even if I wanted to stop sinning, it would still happen.  It's almost like I don't have a choice in the matter as it's bound to happen.  Now I don't run with that thought and sin on purpose but I do feel like sometimes it's not my fault, especially when I feel like I can't control it.  One thing that can be really tough for me is when I'm having a rough day with the kids and I start yelling, excessively or fiercely.  Usually I pick up on it and pray for God to help me as it's getting out of my control ( and before it's physically out of control).  Once I hit a certain point of anger then I can't stop that cycle.  I think when I pray about it I expect God to take over because I know can not handle it emotionally at the moment. 

To answer the questions... for the most part,  I think I am grounded in God but on occasions (like this) I don't really know what my anchor is because I don't feel God's protection/comfort.

I have a similar situation going on with my work where normally I am grounded in God but it seems my prayers are not helping/working.  I don't always expect God to just fix my problems but I do expect him to help me emotionally through them; and sometimes when I'm in a hot spot, then I feel at a loss with God. 

I am meeting with a mentor soon as my usual means of comfort are not working.  Do any of my christian friends have any suggestions for me? 

From whom do I seek approval? I think I seek general approval from everyone around me like most people.  Sometimes it is hard when society's approval does not match God's.  And sometimes what seems like society's approval is really not approval, it's just what makes life easy.   I know that it has taken years for me to not need approval from a certain family member of mine, and although I want their approval I need to keep myself protected which means keeping a distance/wall.  I also know at work when I get my evaluation I want it to go well.. as I seek their approval.  Often I don't think I feel God's approval but I don't feel his disapproval.. his approval is in my heart and if I'm okay then he's okay.  I seek that kind of guidance when it comes to approval.  I am not sure that is right/what God wants as I don't feel approval from God?  Does anyone else feel approval from God?

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